Lighten Up
Elbert Hubbard once said “Don’t take life too seriously. You’ll never get out of it alive.” Some people live their entire life with a serious look on their face because they assume seriousness is a reflection of their importance. If you notice carefully most of the images of many great people of the past are pretty grim & serious. I personally think it is because they did not have digital camera’s with which you can capture hundreds of pictures without wasting any negatives (for young readers who don’t know what a negative is, it’s the film that captured images in a camera in the olden days), I am sure if we had a chance of capturing many moments of their lives we would have more images of them smiling or having fun.
Sometimes seriousness is a good thing, but just like all extremes if we are always serious about every little thing in life than it totally ruins our journey. The Greek Historian Herodotus once said “If a man insisted always on being serious, and never allowed himself a bit of fun and relaxation, he would go mad or become unstable without knowing it.” It’s ironic that we live in a world which offers millions of ways to entertain ourselves and relax our nerves/ mood, yet we have so many people who are stressed out, enduring a lot of anxiety and emotional pain because they do not know how and when to lighten up.
“Don’t take life too seriously. You’ll never get out of it alive.” – Elbert Hubbard
Bob Gass says “Most of us are far too serious. We’re uptight about everything – being five minutes late, getting stuck in traffic, somebody giving us a wrong look, waiting in line, over-cooking a meal, gaining a pound, discovering a wrinkle, making an honest mistake – you name it: we lose all perspective over it! The problem is, we have unrealistic expectations! Think that over for a minute!” It is unfortunate that our inner peace is totally controlled by external happenings and events. All it takes for us to lose our perspective is a small thing that we did not expect or were ready to face.
The true cause of our frustration, seriousness and uptightness has very little to do with our individual differences with people; it has everything to do with our own expectations that are often unrealistic and even unfair.
Richard Carlson suggests two important solutions that can help us gain some balance in life. “You have to see that your own uptightness is largely of your own creation – it’s composed of the way you have set up your life and the way you react to it”. Of course our tendency to be uptight is also partially influenced by the culture and our upbringing at home, but it is true that we cultivate our own reactions. The second step suggested by Carlson is “to understand the link between your expectations and your frustration level. Whenever you expect something to be a certain way and it isn’t, you’re upset and you suffer.”
We all have expectations and when things or people do not respond as we expected we suddenly become serious. The core problem is our strong urge and desire to keep things and people in our control. The true cause of our frustration, seriousness and uptightness has very little to do with our individual differences with people; it has everything to do with our own expectations that are often unrealistic and even unfair. Our unhappiness is often a reflection of our inner shallowness; it’s not about the people around us.
It’s ridiculous to expect life and the world to run according to our expectations. “Our limited perspective, our hopes and fears become our measure of life, and when circumstances don’t fit our ideas, they become our difficulties” says Benjamin Franklin. It’s Ok to have expectations, but always remember that they are just expectations not laws on which the world runs. So the next time something happens contrary to your expectations, do not panic or become uptight, relax and lighten up. In the big scheme of life none of these apparent difficulties are going to matter, but how we react to such differences and difficulties does impact our peace and joy in this journey. If John the Baptizer lived today and saw some of our faces, he would be tempted to say “Behold the lamb of God that is trying to carry the problems of the whole world” (just kidding). Don’t be too serious, lighten up and enjoy the ride.
In the big scheme of life none of these apparent difficulties are going to matter, but how we react to such differences and difficulties does impact our peace and joy in this journey.
– – Author: Rev. Francis Burgula – –
